WordVixen.com

Kathy at Screw You! posted today (er, technically yesterday) about a contest to be added to a Writer’s Digest editor’s blogroll. Naturally I followed the link over to Writer’s Perspective to check out the contest.

Maybe I should have expected this, she is a WD editor after all, but it’s a great blog! Whether you plan to enter the contest or not, I recommend heading over and checking it out. Most of us that visit each others’ blogs lean more toward the novel side of writing, but it certainly can’t hurt to read up on the freelancing and editing sides from an industry professional.

Plus, it’s interesting and another method of productive procrastination.

Title: Hal Spacejock, Hal Spacejock: Second Course, Hal Spacejock: Just Desserts
Author: Simon Haynes
Genre: Humorous Sci-Fi
Publisher: Freemantle Arts Centre Press
Price: $17.95 US at Powells , $16.45 AU at BookWorm, or free here

I first discovered Simon Haynes while reading comments on Miss Snark’s website- only a few days before she hung up her stilettos. Hm… I hope the two aren’t related.

Anyway, I thought “Heh. Funny comment. I’ll go look at his blog.” Lo and behold, he was a multi published author! Of humorous Sci-Fi no less- one of my favorite genres. So I surfed around a bit, found a contest to win a signed copy, entered, and promptly forgot about it assuming that I never win contests so I wouldn’t win.

Still, I was rather enamored by the fact that there was still humorous Sci-Fi being produced and tried to buy his books at our local Barnes & Noble. No luck. And a few days later, I won. A few weeks after that, I won the whole set.

The basic story line is “bumbling space pilot tries to make a simple delivery, bad things happen, reader pees pants laughing, and delivery gets made”. Now, this isn’t going to be very easy to describe except in writer terms- but since that’s the whole point….

There is minimal character arc for Hal and Clunk (Hal’s trusty sidekick)- this is done on purpose. Each book is able to stand completely on it’s own, no need for back story. Back story makes it better, but it’s not actually necessary. There usually is quite a bit of story arc for the secondary/antagonist characters which gives you the feeling of fulfillment without ever limiting Hal and Clunk’s run in book form.

As for story arc… the books don’t so much arc as they go crashing headlong into walls. Have you ever seen an episode of I Love Lucy? That’s the story structure. Lucy (Hal) wants something. Ricky (antagonist) stands in her way. Ethel (Clunk) is the voice of reason but goes along with Lucy’s (Hal’s) mad scheme anyway. Food fights and embarrassing situations abound, and while the plot is tied up, the story isn’t.

Do you want to know how funny these books are? My husband, who’s response to my squeals of “I won, I won!” was along the lines of eye rolling and “so what?”, picked up the first book to see just how stupid it was, opened it to a random page, read one line and started laughing.

I started laughing at the first sentence.

Simon’s great with little turns of phrase, subtle puns, and sometimes blatant slapstick. It all melds together to make one big raised eyebrow, guffawing, giggle fest. And here’s what I recommend these books to all writers for. There are virtually no adverbs in the entire set (thus far) outside of dialogue.

I noticed it about ¾ through the third book (Just Desserts)- no adverbs. His descriptions are great, dialogue is fluid, and the way he introduces and skims things of an adult nature make the whole situation ten times funnier than it would be if he gave in and went for the jokes that I’m sure he desperately wanted to write.

You can see his growth as a writer through the first three books. The first being funny with some good characters. The second being funnier, and the characters more real. The third is the absolute best so far- I’d even recommend starting with that one if you can only order one book. Though two had a really interesting planet to explore.

I give these books an absolute thumbs up. The rules that are broken are broken on purpose, they’re entertaining, funny, and something you can actually learn from.

Now, I know that people fall for scams every day. I know that fewer people can read or spell every day. But seriously- if you get an email from “COCA-COLA” with “Wining Notifications” in the subject line, would you believe it?

Forget for a moment that I never entered any coca cola contests. Forget that a legitimate email from Coke is more likely to say “Coke” or “Coca-Cola” or something else entirely. But if you can’t even spell “Winning”, just who are you trying to fool?

Normally I’m the number one defender of copyright but I am soooo violating that now. It’s a scammer, so what are they going to do. Sue?

“Congratulations your email is among the seven lucky winning, that won ?2,000,000.00{Two million Pounds Only}Each in the just concluded draw held in London -UK to promote South African 2010 World Cup,sponsored by Coca cola and British American tobacco in collaboration with companies in south Africa.for prize claiming,Call your claiming agent Mr Peter Tony on this phone number :+(deleted by WV) or email him on Email: petony@scammers.com (ok, I changed the email address. I wonder if it exists?).Also provide the following information for the processing of your winning fund.

NAME:………………

ADDRESS:……………..

NATIONALITY:………………….

SEX:………………

AGE:…………….

PHONE/MOBILE:……………………..

FAX:……………………………..

OCCUPATION:……………………….

COMPANY:………………….

Your Email Attached to Ticket No: (7YZ206) and ballot No: BT120/A)

Yours Faithfully,

Management.

Tel:+(deleted by WV)

Fax:+(deleted by WV)”

Oh, My, Dog. I’m hoping that English isn’t their first language, because if it is, then scammers aren’t taking advantage of idiots. Scammers are the idiots.